New Beginnings

The first of January 2021 was the single greatest day in the history of this sovereign United Kingdom. Despite the efforts of the remaining quislings and plutocratic European sympathisers we have escaped the clutches of the biggest mafia racket in the world!

The UK can finally plough on through choppy seas, Captain BoJo at the helm, swashbuckling our way through the world’s markets. As the old war horse Iain Duncan Smith says “I wish I was ten years younger!” so he could scramble up the metaphorical rigging and fight off the Zambezi pirates no doubt! I also wish I was fifteen years younger because then trying to talk sense into to the student bar maids probably wouldn’t warrant such a ferocious response from other punters. Also that CCTV footage proves I was only trying to stop her from falling over and not “groping her backside” like that newspaper story makes out.

Yet despite the fact the oppressive mechanisms of the EU machine have been removed from our necks. The sword of fate no longer at our throats but in our hands! All of this has been achieved through the blood, sweat and tears of one man. NIGEL FARAGE.

A humble and dignified human who no doubt would have happily just put his coat on and stepped outside for a fag than been recognised with honours and wealth.

A man whose personality has driven a deep fissure into the heart of Remoaning Socilisim in this country. A crack in the red ruby of Communism that can’t be repaired with all the glue in Maoist China!

In all the joy and laughter you’ll be sharing with your fellow Brexiteers over the coming celebratory months please spare a moment and raise a glass for the man who made it happen. Nigel we salute you.

Published by battlcomedy

General agitator. Probable traitor. Enjoys the finer things in life like Skol Super on a Sunday.

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