Back In Business

So I’m back. I was caught up in a great “pingdemic” con after multiple messages came through saying I had to self isolate. As we all know Covid is spread by 5G and Remoaners so I was forced to “go dark” as we say in the forces.

I received an email saying I had contracted the rare “Covid 69” strain. I immediately strode to my GPs (luckily my 4 year ban for staging the one man protest over the possibility of a discussion being had about making the surgery more “trans friendly” had just expired. Don’t get me wrong I don’t know anything about this trans thing but it’s “different” and as Farage probably says “if it’s different it ain’t Brexit” or something) and demanded the cure I know they’ve got locked up in the back rooms. Saving it for Marxist footballers I bet.

They told me that there was no such thing as Covid 69 which vindicated all of my suspicions around this vaccine mumbo-jumbo and I left.

However it turned out a number of my kids friends had “hacked” my phone and had tricked me. So I didn’t have Covid and I can’t have caught a made up disease anyway.

What’s being going on in the land of the free since my isolation? Well Flight Commander Farage has been given his prime time TV show. I imagine it will be as filled with good old British fun as Noel Edmunds House Party.

Perhaps he could convince a couple of his political friends to join in. Show a different side to the alt right. Maybe Richard Tice getting covered in gunge or Thérèse Coffey standing in for Mr Blobby! Japes all round.

Farages show doesn’t have to be all shouting at immigrants and smiting the woke hordes with molten truth. That can be saved for weekends.

I think Farages successful move into TV should pave the way for future forays by our best and brightest. I for one would like to see a Police Camera Action show following Priti Patel around. Kicking in doors and dragging terrified families blinking into the light as they’re questioned on thier legal status!

Quality Sunday morning viewing.

Published by battlcomedy

General agitator. Probable traitor. Enjoys the finer things in life like Skol Super on a Sunday.

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