Measure Up

Finally bringing back proper measurements to the Great British public is a solid slap in the face to those who doubted the relevance of Brexit.

I and a number of lads never quite got our heads round this “pence and pounds” nonsense that sprung up out of nowhere. So to see this change back to the good old days is a welcome relief.

In this country we used ounces, groats, thrupney bits and pieces of paper with pictures of cats drawn on as currency. Hell I remember when you could pay for a whole month in a caravan in Dorset with 34 jam jars and a good sing song!

We Brits had our quirky differences in measurements for a number of reasons. For example we used to call “miles” “jumps” and we’d say “there’s four jumps to a leap” and of course a “leap” is 3/8s of a bare furlong. The reason we did this was to keep the Japanese submarine commanders (stationed at listening posts across the Channel) confused about our troop movements

By rejecting the authoritarianism of the EU we can finally rejoice in proper British measurements again. I imagine some revellers will be dusting off the bunting for the weekend celebrations!

In all seriousness though we need to move back to a time when things were better. A time when children were scamps and a Bobby could clout a Irishman for looking ar him funny. A time of outdoor toilets and shipbuilding. A time when a day’s graft meant graft.

Published by battlcomedy

General agitator. Probable traitor. Enjoys the finer things in life like Skol Super on a Sunday.

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