Don’t Resign

Sly hands Hancock gets a bit handsy with the office totty and the frigid left are all choking on thier vegan sausage rolls.

What the Socialists don’t understand is that highly sexual, powerful young go-getters like BOJO and Hancock are at constant risk of beautiful women flinging themselves at them. These ladies are powerless to resist the inherent sexual charm that radiates out from these men of power.

Matty H only did what any other hot blooded British man would do when approached by a bold sexually infused woman. In fact it would have even been a greater crisis had he spurned her advances. We, the great Brexit public, would have been puzzled at this behaviour saying: “what’s Hancock got to hide from this lady? Does he prefer kids instead?”

He’d get rightly hounded out of office for been a nonce. But luckily we don’t have a labour government so it wasn’t the case.

We’ve got a strong, stable and virile government ready to rodger their way through foreign dignitaries to secure fresh markets for British produce!

I, and I think I speak for the British people, support this strong masculine behaviour. I can already hear the Spanish and Germans locking up thier lustful Fraus and Senoritas as our well heeled negotiating teams come into view!

So don’t bow to this leftist pressure Matt! Real men are behind you and we’ve got tissues if you need them. Never resign never surrender

The Night Of The G7

Once again the “crazy” EU are at slapping thier dicks on the table and calling it Christmas. After suffering the grandiose defeat that Brexit wrought their extreme pettiness has burnt its way through.

That bunch of cold custard drinkers in Brussels have decided that we, the UK, are to adhere to the Northern Ireland protocol. A protocol thier claiming WE signed.

Now knowing Boris like we all do, we know this benevolent uncle of the nation wouldn’t have signed anything that would put the peace of Northern Ireland in jeopardy. BOJOS oven ready deal would have been cooked, served, enjoyed and we’d be preparing for our just desserts if the EU hadn’t stuck thier baguettes in.

The annexation of Eire has been mooted and discussed in pubs and kitchenettes up and down the country for years. We the British people believe the only way that this issue can be solved is full absorption of Ireland and turning it into a theme park. Like Beamish but a entire country

For too long the EU have ruled the roost with thier rules and written words…. Well Brexit wasn’t won with reading but with gumption and steel. We won’t roll over and adhere to agreements just because international law says we should. No sir. Where was International law when Klaus and the gang were pour Panzers into Paris? Cowering behind bulwarks like Johnson I imagine

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